Because of dependence on so called love, she has difficulty making choices between her personal wellness and disrespect he displays toward her.
She exhibits dependency and insecurity, giving the impression she is too helpless to function independently of a conning, sometimes overbearing man, whose jealousy and control is not about any kind of love he pretends to show toward her. It is about making sure to shield his interest against another guy’ s encroachment. Thing is, the lady might mean something else to him-caring and loving, while his passions are sex and other benefits, which usually he attempts to protect by managing her to prevent another man from snatching her.
She consistently exercises bad judgment and lack of assertiveness, departing her vulnerable to the extent of every other love partner treating her as doormat. Knowing the dire scenario of the relationship, she questions exactly why, but never makes an effort to reevaluate what exactly men that do not know each other, let alone compare information, see about her that request using her to their respective advantage.
By her behaviour and attitude, the lady unsuspectingly allows him or others to act on her behalf by apparently expressing what she truly considers and feels but unwilling to speak out; by placating her self-worth, she inadvertently transfers capacity to him, giving him authority to speak for both of them. She is quite aware that his extreme jealousy could lead to violence, but remains convinced she could manage their behaviour; after all, he loves her, she tells herself. Because of a feeling of love emanating from your pet, albeit false, she remains within an unconscious state of denial regarding her ominous situation, despite friends and relatives support and information to reevaluate and drop the loser.
Because she lacks self-worth though denies it, she has a habit of always finding excuses meant for why she cannot stand up meant for herself against physical and mental abuse by him. In addition , the lady chooses not to walk away owing to addressing threats from him that if the lady did, bad thing will happen with her. What she does not realize, much less understand is, such a threat is program code for his fear of what might happen to him if she remaining. The principal message from any guy posing threats against a woman in this fashion is, “ I am scared and dependent on you”; if you walk away I will fall apart. Only smart ladies have the ability to discern a controlling man’ s weaknesses, based on warnings plus threats. Seemingly, women have not reach grip with the common cord that runs through every scared, reliant, yet controlling man. Generally, they are lazy and would never dream of walking away to be by themselves. The second reason meant for staying put, even though he can make her look like crap is, he is never sure if the next girl would put up with his laziness because his current partner does. Behavior are hard to break; thus, a guy that is used to controlling women will be hard pressed to adjust to another woman effective at standing up to him. Essentially, because he is so dependent on women supporting your pet, he has no clue how residing alone would affect his success.
A person give him a free pass to continue mistreating you when you surrender your values by signaling you are needy, vulnerable and might become lonely if he leaves you. It might not have to get in his active makeup to dream of leaving, knowing he is too very lazy to be on his own. Yet he will perform up his readiness to move upon, having sized you up enough to know you are supposedly weak.
As feminine, another reason why you find excuses in his favour is that as much as he mistreats you, you are the one feeling scared and guilty that if you walked aside something might happen to him. In essence, you are scared for him. Hmm! A classic case of lacking self-introspection is when you, the victim associated with abuse allows pity for the criminal-the abuser to cloud your common sense about making the ultimate decision to walk. Is that pretentious smile a person often wear around family, friends, and co-workers a mere shield, covering the hurt feelings you endure day-to-day because of your partner’ s behavior and attitude toward you? Harm feelings or not, dependently controlling males maintain one trick that pulls vulnerable women in ways that neutralize momentary anger. Good old sex with a twist of “ baby I really like you. ” Women like to listen to, if not having a man hug all of them and say I love you. As opposed to men, whose endgame must consist of penetration, making love for many women can mean a mere hug, kiss plus cuddling. Does this describe a person in any way?
Finally, against all odds, the lady refuses to acknowledge the toxicity from the relationship to her peril, even though she actually is a sucker for protecting your pet, while inadvertently allowing him to filter out what he does not want to hear, coming from her. Arguably, she actually is living in unconscious denial about the truth that takes away from her in favour of rewarding him, despite his contempt for her. She cannot be sure that this individual feels guilty for his behavior as much as she feels it is her mistake for why he behaves adversely toward her. Hence, my diagnosis is, any woman that authorize as owning any or all of the over drawbacks, would be correct in defining themselves as unworthy, which attracts the doormat perception about a person. You simply lack soul, which energies me to ask this question: meant for whom are you living and exactly why, if you have cut yourself loose human dignity to accommodate a loser man? How do you plead?